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# the non-linearity of having kids in quick succession
- URL: https://www.arrieta.io/non-linearity-of-having-kids/
- Published: 2025-04-07T23:36:03.000Z
- Updated: 2025-04-07T23:36:03.000Z
- Description: non-linear effects and negative convexity can be described and explained using different methods. Depending on the method used, a different level of understanding is attained.
- Author: luis arrieta
- Tags: family, random

non-linear effects and negative convexity can be described and explained using different methods. Depending on the method used, a different level of understanding is attained.

## for nerds: conceptual understanding

This method utilizes the cartesian plane, as follows: the function of x is plotted as a curve, not a straight line.

![](https://storage.ghost.io/c/82/18/82182efc-6d17-43fb-bbd1-197df3da9a93/content/images/2025/04/convexity.jpg)

non-linear functions: the effect is a curve, not a straight line

## for the common folk: intuition

From Antifragile, Chapter 18: On The Difference Between a Large Stone and a Thousand Pebbles.

> A story present in the rabbinical literature (*Midrash Tehillim*), probably originating from earlier Near Eastern lore, says the following. A king, angry at his son, swore that he would crush him with a large stone. After he calmed down, he realized he was in trouble, as a king who breaks his oath is unfit to rule. His sage advisor came up with a solution. Have the stone cut into very small pebbles, and have the mischievous son pelted with them.  
>  
> The difference between a thousand pebbles and a large stone of equivalent weight is a potent illustration of how fragility stems from nonlinear effects. Nonlinear? Once again, “nonlinear” means that the response is not straightforward and not a straight line, so if you double, say, the dose, you get a lot more or a lot less than double the effect— if I throw at someone’s head a ten-pound stone, it will cause more than twice the harm of a five-pound stone, more than five times the harm of a one-pound stone, etc.

## for the practitioner: blood, toil, tears, and sweat 

My kids are only 16 months apart in age. Currently, they are 3.5 and 2 years old. Of the 86,400 seconds in a day, 64,800 (give or take) are lived in the outer ends of the exhilaration-rage spectrum.

It's been like this for about two years.

When talking to people who either have only one child, or have waited 3+ years in between kids, I often ask them if 64,800 seconds rings true to them.

Not even close. They don't even know such number could be calculated.